I have seen these check-in posts a few times on social media and honestly, I have never replied because I simply did not know my answer! While mostly blue (good/okay), I’ve had moments of orange (struggling), flashes of black (in a bad place), evenings of green (doing great), and hours of yellow (okay-ish). And this is usually within one day!
So yes: How do you feel now?
This is such an important question to really allow yourself to sit with and see what comes up for you. Like me, you may find your answer to be quite the moving target and sometimes landing in places you may have never felt before.
A cough brings an inkling of fear. Your child’s uncharacteristic mid-day nap has you checking on them every 15 minutes assessing their temperature. Grocery shopping brings up questions of safety and exposure.
And… not having to leave the house by a certain time in the mornings for school or work brings gratitude at the new-found ease. Walks in the middle of the day invite you to pause and appreciate being in the here and now.
I have had moments when I yelled, “I am not a math teacher and certainly not a special education teacher!” as well as days that ended with all of the distance learning tasks done by 2pm and me saying to (both me and) my son, “You did really well today.”
Life in these times is full of new experiences. Maybe one of the biggest new experiences for many is the act of paying attention to ourselves in the first place. We have all been thrown into a new way of being. Whether you are still working or not, parenting and “homeschooling” or not, or being single in a world where a first date seems like a sudden impossibility, we are all living life in a world we have never experienced before. Yes, that can bring fear, but also wonder.
I am reminded of teachings which gave the advice to do simple things differently when one was looking for ways to break up patterns in their life, like driving a different route to work or putting your pants on by leading with the opposite leg you typically do. Simple changes that help you become more present to the moment because you are breaking up the unconscious patterns. Now every pattern in our lives seems to be broken – many people are not even driving to work anymore at all and some of us are not even wearing pants!
So the advice that feels right in this moment is to pay attention to all the feelings coming to the surface. Allow yourself to have the experience you are having in any given moment. Take note of what gives you those green- or blue-heart moments, feel the emotions they stir up from gratitude to joy and love, and choose to do those activities as often as you can. And when you find yourself in the black- or red-heart moments, take a deep breath and feel those feelings too. They are part of your human experience and deserve to be heard and held with compassion.
By seeing and feeling where you are now and bringing love, acceptance, and compassion to any given moment, you can transform your experience and ultimately how you live in this new world and beyond.
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